Today was the last official day of my first year at college and I’m just recalling how I came so close to (stupidly) leaving all this behind but I am so glad I didn’t because nothing beats the happiness and comfort I found in NUS.
I can’t possibly stuff everything in here, but: minority lunches, ridiculous lit exposure mod lectures, Crocs are Kool, Bollywood chaos with Miyuki, uTown study sessions and slacking on the green with my one true love Dana, walking from uTown to KR because shuttle buses are crap, being in a constant sweaty as heck state, constantly laughing in marketing lectures with Darren (with amazing teachers who come up and thank you because they are just that humble), being challenged every minute in Crit Reading, being absolutely befuddled by totality, Crocs finding out about Oedipus for the first time, his shorts, Un Chien Andalou, leaning on Aisyah during an intense moment in class and not getting shrugged off, R21 Thursday lunches with 1Fass, EN Alots Anonymous, “please be my doctor”, horrid groupwork, “media are”, bitching sessions with Doob, Fluff Bakery, Miralliance, SyaSya, all the birthday surprises, #alagucomestonus, umbrella feet, last min essay rush all-nighters, my gurl Amy, ‘whispering’ stupid things to Crocs and getting into trouble because he always laughs way too loudly, always having Aisyah (even if she does give me too much tough love), freezing lit lessons, cute encounters with cute white boys, collab commons, compliment circles, “ooookay, okay okay, ooookay”, getting lost in FASS pretty much every day, “Darren is a good guy! It’ll be fine!”, bad printing memories in CLB, reading short stories in class complete with voices, finally learning more about my indian history, favourite hugs from Mira, picnic on the patch, unexpected fanfic company with Jingyin, “I only wear these shoes with this outfit cos they match”, spontaneous lit lunches (and planned lit lunches), bad module bidding memories, hangman with Mei Jia, screaming with Gerrie at The Player and so many more wonderful, beautiful, fabulous, precious, insane memories and even if I may not always remember them all right this moment, I’ll always remember how they made me feel: 100% young, free, wild (using this ironically, I promise)
Ended off the year in the best way possible, with an amazingly standard school day with great lit baes, Thursday lunch, and dinner at uTown. Lying on the green holding hands with Amirah and Dana (cos i’m a ho) (sorry Aisyah we luv u), staring at the sky and pretentiously trying to identify stars, rolling down the slope like madwomen under the cover of nightfall, finding the best seating positions with Dana. I can think of no better tribute to the emotional roller coaster of an academic year I’ve had at NUS, and right now I’m so unbelievably filled with warmth and happiness and goodness and it sucks that every happy moment is turning into a memory so swiftly but I’m so prepared to enjoy every bit of the next 3 years to come and just AIYA I’M HAPPY I STAYED IN SINGAPORE AND WENT TO NUS AND EVERYTHING OK EVERYTHING IS GREAT LET’S HOPE I DON’T FLUNK OUT.
So today I have decided that there are some people in the world whom you just can’t please. No matter how well you do, no matter how brightly you shine, they will always find a point of criticism. They will always find a way to rain on your parade. They will always find a way to undermine your successes and make you feel small and unworthy.
When people don’t appreciate and adore the person that you are, at this very moment, they are not worth your effort. No matter how much you try, you are never going to match up to the ideal in their minds and that’s okay. Because that’s their ideal, not yours.
“It’s all right. We’re in a fight. You boys are doing all that you can do. Anybody can see that. Win or lose… We gonna walk out of this stadium tonight with our heads held high. Do your best. That’s all anybody can ask for.”
-Coach Boone, Remember the Titans
So I have the house all to myself after ages and ages and that means… TIME TO SING OBNOXIOUSLY LOUDLY TO BAD SONGS. Other than that, I feel six years old with all the advice my family gave me:
- Mum: Don’t go downstairs to buy food! Order instead, it’s safer!
- Bro: Don’t order from McDonald’s, the Indian guys all flirt with you on the phone. Order Pastamania.
- Dad: Don’t open the gate when he comes. Just try and squeeze the bag through the openings in the gate.
- Bro: Don’t let them know you are home alone! Blast music so it sounds like you are having a party or something!
LOL they obviously don’t see the gaps in their arguments I mean:
- Definitely, let me inform some random guy of my address, that is much safer than going down to the hawker centre.
- LOL let’s just say that when they see me in my pyjamas, they’ll be disappointed more than encouraged.
- … this isn’t even possible so I’m not sure what to say.
- Why would I order for one person if I’m having a party? Party of one I suppose LOL RAISE THE ROOF.
Still, it’s nice to see that they care and feel young after having to make frightening decisions for the future recently.